I think too much.
Really, that's what it comes down to.
This blog was born as a place to capture the continuous stream of babble that frequently exits my mouth, traveling down from that busy brain, often missing the pit-stop at filterland.
I was sure my friends, family, and husband, although ever-patient and kind, must surely get tired of my repetitious commentary on my current hot topic of the day. Rick Mercer became famous for his rants, while I probably just lose friends.
As a big fan of words, I figured a blog would be a good spot to get it all out, hopefully leaving more space in that whirring brain for quiet, listening to, enjoying, and being enjoyable to those people I love. I could put it all out there, and who knows, maybe someone would even read it. At least that person would be an audience who was a willing participant, reading of their own will rather than through forced politeness.
But then... the strangest thing happened.
Very quickly, I found I had more things to write about gratitude, love, motherhood, joy, and inspiration than I did on my strong opinions or frustrations. I found myself mentally cataloging small moments I treasured as I went through my day with the kids, to record them later on the blog. Soon I was photographing our lives more thoughtfully, attempting to translate the wonder into one moment in a picture. My blog became a place where I could use the process of writing itself to transform bouncy thoughts that seemed so jumbled and disjointed, into an order that made sense to me, helping me to consciously realize what I actually thought, how I really felt about something. What's more, I found a whole new community out there! My blog had become a creative outlet, a record, a gratitude journal, a sounding board, a story of our family journey.
Now sometimes, I still pull up that old soapbox.
You'll recognize those posts, the ones with few pictures that are way too long. I will tell you that people take offense too easily and this is how I really feel. Feel free to say, "Victoria, take a nap and a deep breath and get over yourself." I won't mind. On other days, I'll tell you how I got my feelings hurt and people should be more kind to one another. Sometimes I remember that nothing is black or white. I won't promise that I won't contradict myself, or always even make sense.
Often, it's very noticable by my absence online that life off screen is very full at the moment. Schedule has never been my strong suite. And I will never claim to be short on words. Yes. Longwinded is a box I can check.
Tiny Muses is about the musing I do. It's about my own four tiny-bodied real-life muses, those little people who inspire me to do better, to think deeply, to live passionately, to act kindly, to be brave, to attempt greatness so I can also be an inspiration to them.
Welcome to my brain.